Sunday, October 19, 2008

I Have a Llama

She spits. Maggie, my youngest daughter who will turn three in December, has recently developed her own expression of anger. When "provoked," she will walk around the house leaving trails of bubbly saliva on anything in sight. This (and every other seemingly dysfunctional habits my kids have) has left me wondering what I did to cause the behavior. I don't spit at people when I'm mad, or drizzle a string of goober along the floor in front of them. In general, I keep my anger clean.

So, where did she learn to spit? Having spent a fair amount of time in the jogger, the only way I can place some blame on myself (which of course I absolutely MUST do) is to assume she sees the spit flying on the run. Yep, I'm one of those girls. I spit innumerable times during my runs, have mastered the farmer blow and have been known to use my shirt as a kleenex in a pinch. Not too much girl-girl in me, I guess. At least not when I'm running.

Looks like it's time for me watch myself when I'm running with Maggie in the jogger these days. The front end and tail end of two are very different--on the cusp of three years kids pick up so many behaviors. Which means I have to give up my other favorite "skill" for a while or my daughter will never get potty trained. A good friend once taught me to pee standing up (just pull the running shorts to the side, girls!); I'm sure it would totally confuse her little mind. I can only imagine what she's thinking... "Mommy goes potty when she needs to, too. I don't really need a bathroom if she doesn't!" Lucky for me it's an art form that can't be done with tights on, so I guess pretty soon I'll be forced to stop anyway. For now, when I duck into the bushes, I'll turn the jogger the other way so she's none the wiser.

Back to my llama girl... I know it could be worse. The dogs help me out by licking up any spit they find that might contain a food crumb. And my girl is expressing her feelings, right? While part of me prefers the thought of a teenage girl spitting over a teenage girl screaming and crying, I know it's not going to happen. She'll get through this phase and soon find a new way to express her little emotions. Let's just hope she doesn't pull her diaper to the side and leave her mark in other ways!


  1. Just a phase! No worries!

    And, for the record.....I have seen this girl pee standing up and it is quite the art form. Amazing!

  2. Darcy - when you say "this girl" do you mean Maggie or Kara?? And yes, I'm sure that this is just a phase. Think of it this way: maybe it'll keep strangers away from pinching her cheeks and she'll get fewer colds this winter!

  3. For Charlotte--I have never peed standing up (except on my bike) and I have yet to see Laurie do it, but I'm sure I'll have the privilege some day. I've seen my friend Tara do it, so can one of my daughters... I remain a squatter. And, while I'm here, I'm a horrible spitter, too. Can't get that luggie to fly to save my life. Ends up on my leg. Laurie, I'll need spitting and standing pee lessons!

  4. Ok, ok. So I already feel like an interloper as a male reading this mom's blog. But you 'gals' are definitely getting off on this peeing while standing up thing. It's not that big a deal...
    As for the cause of Maggie's spitting. Two problems with the theory (although it does make for a great blog entry - good job, Laurie).
    One is that you give yourself too much credit. You may think that guilt makes your responsible for everything your kids do wrong. But pride makes you think that you actually are the source of all things.
    Two is that when you spit while running, it isn't anger, it's function. Maggie is expressing an emotion and she probably discovered early on that if she spits in someone's face they didn't like it.
    My advice, which you aren't looking for. Don't pay much attention to it. What doesn't attract attention goes away quickly.

  5. precariouspastor- Points well taken. Spoken like a true parenting pro.
    Girls- I still think it's a big deal to pee standing up! Makes me feel muy macho! And, yes, let's hope the spitting is just a phase!